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Back in 2014, pro climber Alex Honnold gave us a tour of the 2002 Ford Econoline E150 he used as his mobile base camp. That van served him...
Maybe it’s just me, but noisy neighbors, overflowing dumpsters, and smelly bathrooms combine to represent the exact opposite of the experience I’m looking for when I camp. But campgrounds aren’t intimidating and make spending a night outdoors as easy as possible. Is there some way you can leave them behind without sacrificing convenience?
This is my attempt to give you the tools you need to leave crowded sites behind forever.
The other week, I wrote a basic guide to understanding and using all the different types of public lands. The relevant thing to this discussion is that while we’re drawn to the iconic attractions found in national parks, camping is often easier and more fun in the National Forest and Bureau of Land Management acreage that surrounds those parks.
On that less regulated land, camping is typically permitted pretty much anywhere, with some basic guidelines I’ll cover below; you’re free to just go find a pretty spot and camp there.
The trouble is that freedom also comes with a big unknown. What’s up that dirt road? The answer could just as easily be a locked gate or vehicle-damaging obstacle as it could be a beautiful lake. Lucky for you, a new app called OnX Offroad combines in-depth dirt-road navigation data with detailed maps into one slick, intuitive solution that you can use even after you leave cell reception behind.
Empowered with those two pieces of knowledge—freedom to camp on national forest and BLM land, plus the ability to navigate them—your approach to finding an epic site can simply be identifying a general area in which you want to go, asking yourself how far down a dirt road you want to travel, then looking for a cool destination. That’s the approach I use when I’m planning a camping trip, whether it be a night outdoors just outside town, a destination for a big trip, or just a place to crash when I’m travelling.
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Camping outside of a designated campground on U.S. Forest Service or BLM land means that you’re doing something called dispersed camping. There are some basic guidelines to doing that in order to minimize your impact.
Where:
Fires:
Human Waste:
For further guidance, consult Leave No Trace.
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Organized campgrounds provide picnic tables, fire rings, grills, bathrooms, and dumpsters. That probably gives you some idea of the extra stuff you’re going to need to bring along. Let’s start there.
The more you learn about the all of the above through your own experience or by reading reviews and other articles here at Outside, the more comfortable you’ll be. You don’t need to spend a fortune buying the best stuff out there; in fact, I’d encourage you not to. Learn what works for you over time, and scale your gear according to your budget and your own personal needs.
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First: you’ll be fine. But you’ll be more fine if you analyze risks and take some precautions.
Critters: You will not be attacked by animals. But bears, rodents, and birds might get into your food at night. By taking care to clean up camp before you leave it or before you go to bed, then storing anything that may contain food odor either in a strong cooler or inside your locked vehicle, you’ll avoid attracting animals to your campsite.
Bad Weather: This is probably your biggest concern. Look up weather reports ahead of time, but realize that in the mountains, weather can be localized, unpredictable, and extreme. Note that you’ll also lose 3.3 degrees for every 1,000 feet you gain in elevation. Prepare for colder, wetter conditions than you expect to face and you’ll guarantee your comfort.
Getting Lost: Practice using offline navigation apps ahead of time, then make sure you take along the ability to charge your device both while driving and in camp. Bring a backup map. Use the buddy system to ensure that no one leaves camp or travels to and from it alone. When group camping, I always rendezvous with friends in a town where there’s cell reception, then travel to the destination in convoy. Radios—or simply a basic group travel plan where every vehicle is responsible for keeping an eye on the one behind it—are great insurance against someone falling behind. Plan on arriving at your destination several hours before nightfall.
Getting Sick: We’re talking about car camping here, so just take a gallon of bottled water per person per day for everyone to drink, plus a little extra for washing up after cooking. If you must drink water you find outdoors, bring it to a rolling boil for at least one minute before cooling and consuming it. Use hand sanitizer after going to the bathroom or touching raw food.
Breaking Down: If you’ll be traveling on dirt roads, potentially way out in the middle of nowhere, then this is something you need to spend a little time on. First, scale your trips so that they’re suitable both to your experience and the capabilities of your vehicle. Then, as you drive, constantly analyze obstacles and conditions, and make a plan for tackling them. There’s no shame in turning around and staying safe if you feel something is beyond your ability. The most frequent problem you’ll encounter is a flat tire. Make sure you know how to change a tire and that your spare is inflated and in good condition. I’d also encourage every driver doing anything to carry both a puncture repair kit and air compressor, and to practice using those ahead of time. When in doubt, travel with at least one other vehicle.
Spend enough time engaged in bicycle-commuting-themed online discourse and complaining about how nobody pays any attention to you and it’s only a matter of time before someone recommends you put some kind of horn on your bike.
There are various models of high-decibel bicycle horns with flatulent-sounding names available on the market—the AirZound, the Loud Bicycle, the BioLogic Blast—and they each have their devotees. Bike horn enthusiasts also love to make YouTube videos depicting the ostensible effectiveness of their noisemakers in an urban environment. One such rider explains the appeal of the bike horn thusly:
“Stepping off the curb looking into your phone is just insane in New York,” Eugene D. says. The horn cures all that—anytime Eugene activates it, it triggers a reaction in people like they just realized they’re walking into the path of a freight train. “It makes me laugh every time,” he says.
Of course, not everybody appreciates being assaulted with soundwaves, to which Eugene has this to say:
Eugene is unsympathetic. “It just hurts when you realize how unaware people are,” he says. “They think I’m the jerk for following the rules.”
Okay, firstly, Eugene is not following the rules. Honking your horn in New York City in a non-emergency situation is illegal and carries a $350 fine. Granted, this law is enforced so seldomly that the city took down all its no-honking signs back in 2013, but it’s the law nonetheless. Secondly, anybody who unleashes 125 decibels of noise upon total strangers on a regular basis and is not a member of a rock and roll ensemble is, indeed, a complete and utter jerk. (Though frankly much stronger anatomically-themed epithets leap to mind.)
In fairness to Eugene and his horn-honking ilk, it’s understandable that they’re compelled to emulate the behavior of motorists; the message that “bicyclists have all the same rights and responsibilities as motorists” is pervasive in American culture. However, that message is also a complete load of shit, and if you’re going to copy drivers when you’re out on your bike, using a horn is probably the dumbest piece of equipment you can appropriate.
The thing is, horns are inherently stupid and profoundly antisocial, and their very existence is proof of their own uselessness. This is because by the time you’re honking at something you’ve already seen it, and you’ve got plenty of time to react accordingly. Whether you’re in a car or on a bike, if a pedestrian steps out in front of you and you honk at them, you’re doing nothing to promote either their safety or your own. All you’re really doing is scolding them with your Claxon of Shame because they made you feather your brakes for half a second.
I know what you’re thinking: “What nonsense! Car horns prevent collisions! Just the other day I honked at someone who pulled out of the Whole Foods parking lot without looking and they stopped! If I didn’t have a horn I’d have plowed right into them with my Subaru!” Maybe so. In a perfect world drivers would only apply their horns when absolutely necessary, and cars would anally electrocute drivers who use them in non-emergency situations. But our world is far from perfect, and these relatively rare legitimate scenarios do almost nothing to redeem the car horn for being a blight on the cityscape. The rest of the time, the horn merely gives voice to the toddler mindset of the typical driver, and it’s nothing more than a loud, annoying noise they make in order to communicate that they’re angry. Or tired. Or bored. Or hungry. Or that they just shit their diaper. For every one warning honk that may have miraculously transformed a collision course into a near miss, there are a million assholes sitting in traffic jams right now, sounding their horns for no other good reason than to scream “I DON’T LIKE THIS” into the void. And like burnt-out parents, we’ve become desensitized to the incessant bleating, and it serves only to make us resent the source.
(And yes, I realize that in the 21st century the primary use of the car horn is now to alert the phone-addled driver in front of you that the light has changed. For this, I propose a far better and considerably more quiet alternative: nudge them with your bumper. Maybe if we pierce the bubble of driver insularity people will start taking their motoring responsibilities more seriously.)
A cargo ship captain in heavy fog needs a horn; some schmuck in a Hyundai does not. As for the cyclist, befouling a bicycle with a loud horn is like putting a distortion pedal on a Stradivarius, or like gluing great big hairy Popeye arms onto the Venus de Milo. And if you must make noise while riding your bike, we’ve got access to this delightfully sonorous auditory warning system called a bell. Like a horn, it too carries over long distances in order to communicate intent, and yet unlike a horn it does not inspire rage in others. When sharing the streets with your fellow humans, you should be taking your cues from Buddhist monks and not from the engineers at General Motors.
Now stop honking and go meditate on that.